Ah, the uncomfortable truth-in-jest …

Related Posts:

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I would add, it likely is also a life-long process.

Some days I wish I had taken the blue pill instead of the red one. In the movie The Matrix when Neo reaches for the red pill, Morpheus reminds him “I’m only offering you the truth; nothing more.”

Some days the truth stinks.

It wasn’t so long ago I was on staff at a large, respected church, had closet full of nice clothes, a nice house, nice friends, etc.  But somewhere along the way I got offered the red pill.  Now I”m making just above the poverty level, spending my work time with those below and well-below the poverty level.

The church institution has become unreal to me and my wife.  As has the US American culture.  What is more real, more true, is the reality of the One who is the Way, Truth, and Life.

But this more real way is indeed painful.

Though I’ve never detoxed from street drugs, I spend lots of time with those who have or are presently detoxing.  It’s an ugly process.  Everything your mind fights against, your body wants to embrace.  It truly feels like life and death.

The financial comfort, the good social standing, the good standing within the institutional church … all these things I know are shams.  I know it in my head.  I know it like the deepest of convictions.  But the rest of me struggles with a sense of loss for these things.

The majority of the “respectable” folks consider me and my wife wacky, mistaken, bitter, or just flat out wrong.  Those opinions are painful.

A large portion of my clergy peers don’t understand why I left “real ministry,” nor do they see their own complicity with the negatives of institutionalism.  Their limited understanding and denial is painful.

Long time friends and even some family occasionally just don’t get us.  Believe me, that’s painful.

I realize that when Jesus declared that those who follow him must leave behind family, friends, and attachment to institutions and culture, he meant it.

Separation from those within the institutional and cultural milieu is not fun.  It’s easier when there are sojourners to dialogue with.

And it does feel like a matter of life and death.  Every day part of me dies.  And only through hope do I trust it is a necessary part of my life I must lose so that I might be saved.

I guess this post comes from a place of loneliness.  A loneliness I share with Jeremiah and the prophets, Jesus the Nazarene, and even Neo and crew.

Do you share it too?  Are you detoxing from institution and culture?  Is it painful?

–

Brian Niece
www.brianniece.com
If you enjoyed this post, get free updates by email or RSS.Related Posts:

• Why I’m Serving as a Shelter Manager
• Why I’m Serving as a Shelter Manager – Part 2
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• Why Preaching Has Been Too Narrowly Defined

Tonight has been a doozy of a night at the Shelter.  I’ve been dealing with various issues from over the weekend.  We’re six men over what our capacity really is.  I had to excuse a few guys for showing up drunk.  Dealt with a few resident’s personal issues.

But as the evening wore on, I had some wonderful experiences.

I had a conversation with a resident I’ll call “Brandon.”  Brandon sat in my office and talked to me about how he sensed I was beleaguered.   He asked if I was okay.  We talked about the stresses and pressures of this job.  We talked about some of the things he witnessed me handle tonight.  As I was talking, he said he noticed a gleam in my eye, and he thought I seemed lighter of spirit.

He then said, “You really love this work, don’t you?”

Brandon’s right.  I do.  Even when the stress is great, the joy is greater.

It wasn’t like that in “church work.”  The stress just led to more stress, more discontent from myself and others, more frustration.  The joy was sucked right out of me.  Go figure.

Also tonight, our AA meeting was interesting.  A new resident, I’ll call him “Mitch,” sat in on the meeting.  He said that he wasn’t an alcoholic nor addict, but was looking for answers.

Come to find out, Mitch’s wife died from over-drinking a few months ago.  He’s an unemployed widower looking to make a new start in Brunswick.  He carries a lot of guilt, a lot of hurt, and he doesn’t know what to do.

Wow!

Long story, short … It was incredible to see some of the guys who are admitted addicts / alcoholics so affected by Mitch’s story and life circumstance.  They realized the hurt that their addictions can cause.

I was able to speak with Mitch one-on-one a bit later.  The conversation was about brokenness and how God constantly works to create beauty out of all kinds of brokenness.

Now, I could preach all kinds of great sermons on these theological points (and I have).  But in a parish, the people would absorb it on Sunday then go back out and be the same people they were beforehand.

But here at the Shelter, I’m seeing the sermons lived out, experienced, incarnated.

No wonder there is joy in this!

As a dear friend and fellow sojourner commented to me today, this is “prioritizing the poor over the party.”  It may be heresy, as my friend suggested.  So be it.  I’ll be a heretic and obedient in the way of Christ any day, over against being a well-respected clergyman who rarely sees Jesus at the party.

——

Brian Niece
www.brianniece.com
If you enjoyed this post, get free updates by email or RSS.Related Posts:

• Why I’m Serving as a Shelter Manager
• Why Preaching Has Been Too Narrowly Defined
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• Why, Why, Why?
• We Need Culture Change in the Church

It’s encouraging to know there are some Ezekiels, Isaiahs, and Jeremiahs out there.

Imagine how lonely the original prophets must have been. They were blessed because everyone spoke evil of them, hated them, derided them for not getting with the system.

But it was a lonely blessing.

I would not be able to sustain this journey in isolation. God’s grace is good. But it’s wonderful when the grace is found in the form of fellow sojourners who understand what you’ve experienced and why you are where you are.

Do you feel like the North American institutional Church (and churches) just isn’t jiving with the Gospel mission of Jesus of Nazareth? Do you wonder if you are alone, insane, jaded, out of touch?

Put your thoughts and feelings out there. Look for those who are allowing the organic grace of God to permeate their lives. Be willing to discover, and be discovered by, Christ-followers who are hearing the beat of an old, old drum.

They are out there. We are out here.

So, God, may your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as it is where you are …

——

Brian Niece
www.brianniece.com
If you enjoyed this post, get free updates by email or RSS.Related Posts:

• Still Detoxing
• A Lenten Exercise: Analyzing Exile – Conclusion
• In the Meantime …
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• Some Excellent Quotes from Jim Wallis

Okay, that may have been a big motivator for any job, but here I am serving as a manager for a shelter and transitional program for the homeless and working poor. I could be employed doing something that has nothing to do with my life mission. Instead, here I am. And I love it. Why?

As way of explaining why I love this ministry, let me share a story.

A resident — I’ll call him “Gus” — was sitting in my office as I administered a breathalyzer test to him. The night before, his reading was .12 (that’s drunk). Two nights before, I had spent 3o minutes with Gus as he cried and grieved over the recent losses in his life. He was making six figures just 5 years ago. He has two teenage children who are currently living with his estranged wife. His wife has repeatedly cheated on him and finally kicked him out, presumably for excessive drinking and all that drinking entails.

The man who just a few years ago was living the so-called American Dream, was now a resident in a homeless shelter.

And I was noticing a trend. He tends to point at the specks of wood in the eyes of others while ignoring the 2×4 in his own eye.

Gus had been trying to ease his emotional pain with strong liquor. He was not getting with the transitional program. And he was lying to me and my staff to cover it up.

I had prayed with him, helped him secure some income, listened as he processed … all the while I noticed he was in denial as to his culpability of the circumstance he found himself in.

Now, he was sitting in my office again and we were having him blow into a breathalyzer (again) to determine just how much he’d had to drink.

Gus said “just a tall boy about 1pm today.” That would mean he might show a .02 on the meter.

Beep, beep goes the machine. And I read a .10. He’s very drunk again.

In my office with me and Gus is one of my staff members at the shelter — I’ll call him Jim.

After we get the results of Gus’s blood alcohol content, I explain to Gus that he can’t stay at the shelter this night. He now has his 3rd strike. We’ll give him some dinner and a blanket, but he has to face the consequences of his actions.

I’m baffled and frustrated. Not only was he showing up drunk, but he had been previously caught with a fifth of vodka IN THE SHELTER. That’s a big “no no.” He was lucky to be here right now.

He repeatedly had told me what a grace the shelter was: “Two hot meals, a warm shower, a clean bed, a caring staff, a safe place to be.” And he was thumbing his nose at the whole process.

As I tried to fathom why he would push his circumstance to this point, Jim spoke up.

“Gus, you can point at a woman, a bottle of alcohol, life circumstances, everyone else, but nothing is going to fill what’s in here”, as he places the palm of his hand on Gus’s chest, indicating the heart. “That’s a God thing, brother.”

You see, Jim is a staff member who was a resident just 3 months ago when I began the job. He’s one of two former residents who I’ve hired as staff. He had gone 7 years in AA, staying sober. Before that, he had lost his first marriage, his kids, his job, his dignity, his self-respect … everything. After 7 years, he took it upon himself to start over. When he began trusting himself, he fell off the wagon again. This time, none of his family threw him a lifeline. They cut him off. So after running for a long time, he ended up in the shelter.

After proving his sobriety and vowing to be changed, I hired him. Jim wakes up every day and asks God to help him stay sober that day. He is a man of great faith. You wouldn’t find Jim’s theological statements in a systematic theology text. But he has placed his entire life into the hands of someone bigger than himself. He now spends time with his daughters. His rebuilding bridges that seemed nothing but ashes a few months before. Jim trusts God to go before him every step of the way. It’s amazing to watch.

And here was Jim in my office talking to Gus. “Gus, I’ve lost it all: women, family, friends, job, dignity, everything. But nothing addresses the pain in the heart except the One who created you. You can’t turn to him until you recognize you have a problem. It’s a God thing, brother.”

Wow! Here was the gospel being played out right in front of me.

In the typical “church world” I wouldn’t be a witness to this. In fact, every day I work at the shelter, I come home with another story of how I’ve witnessed Jesus in the poor and disenfranchised.

The stuff of Jesus I read in the gospels, I’m privileged to experience almost every day! I never experienced this in the “professional ministry.”

Why am I serving as a shelter manager?

Because I was called to preach the gospel, and when necessary to use words. I finally am living and experiencing the Gospel of Jesus Christ on a daily basis.

It’s humbling, wonderful, heart-breaking, intimidating, joyful, and hopeful all at the same time. I witness lives being transformed. I hang out with the kinds of people Jesus was friends with.

Instead of piddling around with buildings, boards, and budgets I get to offer a cup of cold water in Jesus’ name. I get to clothe the naked, feed the hungry, visit the prisoners, and see the captives set free.

Why would I ever go back to “respectable Christian ministry”?

In future posts, I’ll give more examples to explain the “Why?”. Hopefully, you can see why this is wonderful outpouring of God’s grace: that I be allowed to be part of Christ’s work in this way.

——

Brian Niece
www.brianniece.com
If you enjoyed this post, get free updates by email or RSS.Related Posts:

• Why I’m Serving as a Shelter Manager – Part 2
• Why Preaching Has Been Too Narrowly Defined
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In the meantime, enjoy Keith Olbermann’s latest special comment.  Says a world about the last 8 years.  Also, can those who constructively critique other institutions (i.e., the US American church in it’s public form) sense a bit of the same?  Governing from fear, managing from fear, evangelizing from fear … it’s all from the same angle.

Enjoy …

Related Posts:

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• Prayer of Humility
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• Where is God in Brokenness?
• Changes

Soon I’ll be posting a series of blogs that will catch you up on my life and times.  The theme will be addressing the question of “Why?”

Some of the upcoming posts include:

• “Why I’m Serving as a Shelter Manager”
• “Why I Voted for Obama”
• “Why I Don’t Want to Go to Church Anymore”
• “Why Stewardship Sucks”
• “Why Preaching Has Been too Narrowly Defined”

If any of these peek your interests, if you want to know what’s going on in my life, or if you just want to see how I’ll make a public fool of myself be sure to check back soon.

In the meantime …

Be the Peace!Related Posts:

• Why I’m Serving as a Shelter Manager – Part 2
• Why Preaching Has Been Too Narrowly Defined
• Why I’m Serving as a Shelter Manager
• In the Meantime …
• A Lenten Confession: The Antonym of Me

Readings for the week:
Joshua 24:1-3a, 14-25
Psalm 78:1-7
I Thessalonians 4:13-18
Matthew 25:1-13

Joshua 24:1-3a, 14-25

For a people who spent a generation on the move, this text is the call to stay put in the land YHWH promised their forebears, and to serve the LORD their God alone.  Joshua reminds the people several times here to serve God alone.

Joshua knows that it is all too easy for us to fall back on what we’ve known and miss experiencing the new.  Joshua had witnessed these people complaining while in the wilderness.  He had heard them beg to go back to Egypt, because liberation was not what they thought it would be.  He knew they fashioned a god into something they were comfortable with–a golden calf–when God Almighty became uncomfortable.

Joshua knows this history and so when the people vow, “Yes, of course we’ll serve God and God alone,” Joshua challenges them:  “You can’t do it; you’re not able to worship the LORD. He is a holy God. He is a jealous God. He won’t put up with your fooling around and sinning.”

Have we held to our vow any better?  Don’t think on just an individual basis, think on a communal level.  Has your family, your neighborhood, your faith community, your tribe worshipped the LORD our God alone?  Have I and my family?

Or have we rather served the gods of money, stability, status quo, government, politics, career, prestige, opinion?

What a great text to call us again to answer this simple and profound question:  Who owns you?  And to answer that question, it seems we need to look at what has consumed our time, energy, resources, thoughts, and feelings this past week, month, year?

The apostle James spoke truth when he admonished the Church to let their actions speak.  For a credible communal life speaks louder than any words.

Psalm 78:1-7

Lest we ever forget our mission, the psalmist here poetically calls us to account: Trust in God; never forget the works of God, but keep his commands to the letter.

This text is like a guide to the drama of our lives.  We are to be constantly in dress rehearsal mode.  Rehearse the acts of God to our children, over and over and over again.  Why?  So that we are ready when God reveals himself.  By rehearsing the acts of our LORD, we remind ourselves–whether we are on the mountaintop, in the valley, or in exile–that our God is real, our God cares for us, our God will redeem us, our God will act.

The surprising part is the mystery of how God acts.  Unless we have been rehearsing God’s story, we might miss the “how;” because God often surprised us in how he chooses to redeem.

I Thessalonians 4:13-18

This text has spawned quite a bit of theologically irresponsible notions, such as the rapture.  The Left Behind series is testament to that.  Did you know the word “rapture” does not appear in Scripture?  In fact, the very idea that we will leave this earth at the Second Coming of Christ is not biblical at all.

Stop, take a breath.  I know that sounds heretical.  But read the entire Book of the Revelation.  Especially the ending chapters.  It’s clear that the Revelation of Jesus Christ to John is about the end our salvation story.  And we will not be leaving.  Instead, Christ will return to this world in bodily form, making a new heaven and a new earth, and we will dwell with Jesus in this newly reconciled world!  What a concept.

A biblical view of the end of story does not trivilize salvation as some “get out of earth and hell” card.  Instead, salvation history is the story of God reconciling all things … ALL THINGS … to himself.  How?  I don’t know.  But he’s promised to do it:  “God was in Christ reconciling the world to himself.”

Paul’s emphasis in this text is not on the particulars of the Advent of Christ.  Then what is it on?  Hope.  Paul is encouraging people who have legitimate questions about what comes after death that even in death we will not be out of God’s care.  What a joy to know that because of Christ even death cannot separate us from the faithful love of our Creator.

And Paul urges us to encourage each other continually in light of this great hope.

Matthew 25:1-13

Are we ready to rejoice?  Do we live in a state of expectant joy?  In these final weeks before we celebrate the beginning of the Church Year with Advent, the theme of waiting is already beginning.

There are two ways to wait on the LORD:

1. In a sleepy state, sadly unprepared, or …
2. Ready, joyful, expectant.

This wonderful story Jesus tells of the ten bridesmaids illustrates two different ways to live life: in the kingdom or unaware of the kingdom.  Imagine if we actually lived like our prayer “Your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven” we already being answered in a multitude of ways?  What if we lived like the kingdom of Christ was already breaking into this world?

Guess what … it is!  That is the statement of Christ’s Resurrection.  The world as we have known it has ended.  Death will not win.  God’s care cannot be stifled.  We can never fall out of God’s grace.  Yes, we can reject it, we can choose not to lean into the Spirit’s presence.  But God’s grace is extended to us in all ways in all places.

Do we see it?  Do we see this reality of heaven on earth breaking through the cracks of our false realities?  Jesus preached a kingdom where the poor are cared for, the disenfranchised are the important people in the community, the naked are clothed, the hungry are fed, the blind are given sight.  Where is this happening around us?  When we see it, we should recognize is as the presence of Jesus the Nazarene!

Better yet, we should be part of it.  We should be like the five bridesmaids who were eagerly waiting for the groom.  We should have our lights on, joyful, ready to break out in song and dance when one of the least of these is comforted.

——

Brian Niece
www.brianniece.com

If you enjoyed this post, get free updates by email or RSS.Related Posts:

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Readings for the week:

Deuteronomy 34:1-12
Psalm 90:1-6, 13-17
1 Thessalonians 2:1-8
Matthew 22:34-46

Painted Prayer Book

Deuteronomy 34:1-12

With a background in theatre and a call to preach, I see much in Scripture through the lens of a storyteller.  It is after all God’s story.  This conclusion to the Torah is a very conflicted ending.  It’s a bit like watching a movie that gives you no catharsis, but requires the audience to work out the catharsis after the credits roll.

Moses finally gets his people to this land of promise: it’s just on the other side of the river!  After 40 years of wandering in the wilderness, suffering endless complaints, doing his best to obey God (though sometimes failing in that), being misunderstood by the people he’s trying to lead, going to bat for those people with God when God gets angry … after all this Moses only gets to see the promised land and then die.  It seems so unfair.  But as we turn the page and see the struggles Joshua has in leading the people once in the promised land, I wonder if it isn’t a blessing that Moses doesn’t have to endure anymore.  I can’t imagine how disappointed Moses would be to discover that these self-seeking group of “YHWH’s people” still whine and complain and fear and don’t believe even when they arrive in the promised land.  Or, maybe I can imagine it …

There’s also something here of how Moses equipped the next leader.  While Moses was still the leader, he spent a ton of time with Joshua.  Joshua was prepared for leadership.  Perhaps the people complained, “Moses spends all his time with Joshua, and Aaron, and that crowd … Why doesn’t he visit our tent too?”  What they did not understand is that Moses was pouring his time and energy into good soil that was willing to be equipped for the future good of the people.

Another note on this text … The people mourned Moses’ death for 30 days and then the time of mourning was over.  They moved on.  They didn’t force Joshua to walk around in Moses’ shadow.  Any pastors in the organizational church out there feel like your predecessor is still around because you here said predecesor’s name all the time?  Thought so.  The Church can take a cue from our sacred history here as to how we are to grieve the loss of former leadership and move on to embrace the new.

Psalm 90:1-6, 13-17

In our current culture of US America, it seems we whole-heartedly embrace the notion of individual entitlement from birth (life, liberty, the pursuit of happiness, and so forth).  The Psalmist here reminds us that such a narrative has no place in the Christian story.

We aren’t owed happiness and stress-free life.  We are God’s.  And as God’s people we will flourish and wither; we will suffer and experience joy.  It’s a both/and reality, not an either/or.

I wonder how many local parishes are missing the divine life of Christ because they refuse to endure withering and suffering?  Will we walk through life with our eyes wide open to our call to Christ’s passion?  Will we embrace the God of night so that we can realize the God of day?  Will we suffer as little-Christ’s or despair that our suffering isn’t “fair?”

We can see how Moses endured, walking close to God through disappointment, sacrifice, discouragement, suffering, misunderstanding, disobedience, and eventually his death.

1 Thessalonians 2:1-8

Paul’s letters to the church at Thessalinica are powder kegs for leaders.  Paul pushes back against allegations falsely made of him.  He endures the suffering inflicted by others’ pride, selfishness, or ignorance; but he still lets them know that they are not acting like Christ’s church.

It’s unfortunate that accusations of deceit and the absence of equitable respect for labor are not limited to the early church.  Yet, even when we contemporary leaders find ourselves in these shoes, we have Paul’s example (follow me as I follow Christ).  He continued to preach the truth of the Gospel, even if the people refused to hear it or except it.  Paul then determined which churches and leaders were good soil (that is to say, who would embrace the paradoxical and uncomfortable truth of the Gospel) and put his energy into them.  Do you see a trend here?

Finally, our efforts to share the gospel in word and deed must be motivated by love of God and love of others.  The false requirements of institutions (numbers, money, prestige, toeing the line, etc.) must be dismissed in light of the truth of the Gospel.  And, unfortunately, this will require suffering for those who endeavor to do so.

Matthew 22:34-46

If we Christ-followers could encourage each other to live like this text demands, we might see the world turned upside down!  But oh, how hard it is (once again) to acknowledge that all of God’s story hinges on loving our Lord with our everything and loving our neighbors, too.

Why not pose this open-ended statement to those in your faith community:

If I love you as myself, I would …

Ask someone to make that statement and end the sentence.  Do it yourself.

Let’s get real … being the Church hinges on one simple request: Love God and love others.  That’s it! So in this present world financial crisis, what would loving God and loving others look like?

• Maybe we downsize our homes and vehicles so that we can support others’ needs.
• Maybe we live well under our means with the goal of blessing our neighbors as much as possible.
• Maybe a few of us get together and decide to stop tithing to a building program, or an organization, or an institution, but we decide to live off half our income and give the other half away to the poor, the disenfranchised, the ignored.

Hey, I’m convicted by these statements, so don’t think I’m suggesting what I’m already doing.  But I am seeking to let my whole life (and that means my family finances) speak to the reality of Christ and the truth of the Gospel.

At the least, when we focus so much energy on others, they might just know God by our outpouring of love … and we might become a little less stuck on our lives, our stuff, our agendas, our desires … on us!

——

Brian Niece
www.brianniece.com

If you enjoyed this post, get free updates by email or RSS.

Related Posts:

• Persecution
• On Exodus to the Future
• What’s Love Got to Do with It?
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I am finding out time and time again that we do not have a welcoming culture, but a culture that says it is your job to become one of us. Do the paperwork in a timely matter and that proves your worth. Do this and do that and that will show you care enough…

I have learned that a call for a pastor should not be a call to “come be one of us, do what we want you to do.”  No, no, no.  The call comes from God and invites us to go be agents of change, renewal, and vision.

It seems that our Church culture has not embraced this movement yet.Related Posts:

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• Why I’m Serving as a Shelter Manager – Part 2
• Thoughts while considering the future of my local church
• What Is Emergent? Who Is Emergent? – Part 1
• “If I could just be one . . .”